33. From Pumping to Nursing: Tips for Building a Strong Breastfeeding Relationship After the NICU
Alright, girl, here’s the not-so-fun truth: transitioning from pumping to nursing after a NICU stay can feel like running a marathon while learning how to walk.
It's messy, it's emotional, and it’s far from a perfect path. But you can totally do it. It’s a process, not a race.
But I want you to know: you’re not doing it wrong if it feels hard. This path is anything but linear, and it’s absolutely okay if the journey back to nursing doesn’t look perfect. This isn’t about hitting milestones on anyone else’s timeline—it’s about rebuilding trust, connection, and confidence, one feed at a time.
If you’re in that in-between space—pumping around the clock, navigating tubes or bottles, and wondering how you’ll ever make the shift—grab your favorite cozy drink. We’re about to unpack real, actionable tips to help you build a breastfeeding relationship that works for you and your baby.
Start Slow, and Don’t Rush the Process
You’ve heard it before, but it’s worth repeating: slow and steady really is the way forward here. Coming out of a NICU experience means your baby has already been through so much—and so have you. There’s no gold star for pushing too fast or putting pressure on yourself to “get it right” right away.
If your baby doesn’t latch immediately, or if you're juggling pumping and nursing in short windows, that doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you’re building something new—and that takes time.
Tip: Begin with short, calm nursing sessions, just a few minutes at a time. Under 15 to 20 minutes is a great place to start. Let your baby explore, smell you, feel your skin. Celebrate that. Those little steps matter more than you realize.
Stay in Tune with Baby’s Cues
After the NICU, it’s easy to feel disconnected from your instincts. So much of your baby’s care has been tracked, timed, and clinical—and suddenly, you’re being asked to follow your gut again. It can feel disorienting.
But that quiet, inner knowing? It’s still there. And your baby’s cues are the bridge back to it.
Tip: Watch for signs like rooting, lip smacking, or turning their head toward your chest. These are the early cues your baby gives when they’re ready to nurse. Trust their timing, and try not to stress if things aren’t happening on your timeline.
Find Experienced Lactation Support
Finding the right lactation consultant is like discovering a hidden gem. Trust me, if you haven’t already, seek out someone with NICU experience. They’re the experts at navigating the unique challenges of transitioning from pumping to nursing, and they’ll give you the guidance, confidence, and reassurance you need.
You deserve someone in your corner who gets it—a professional with real NICU experience, who understands the nuances of feeding transitions, medical complexities, and emotional healing.
They’ll help you piece together a feeding plan that works—not just for your baby, but for your mental health, too.
Tip: A good LC will help troubleshoot latch issues, experiment with positioning, and work with your providers to safely reduce tube feeds when the time is right. You’re not supposed to figure this out alone—and you don’t have to.
Skin-to-Skin Is Your Superpower
If there’s one thing that carries magic in the postpartum-NICU blur, it’s skin-to-skin contact. Even when nursing feels far away, this is where trust is built. Where oxytocin flows. Where your baby learns your rhythm—and you remember that you are their safe place.
Tip: Aim for daily skin-to-skin sessions, especially before or after nursing. These moments don’t need to be long or orchestrated. Just hold your baby close, breathe them in, and let the connection build. Bonus: it supports milk production, too.
Have a Plan to Wean Off Feeding Tubes (When Possible)
Transitioning from the NICU feeding tubes to breastfeeding can feel daunting, but it’s important to have a plan in place. Talk with your healthcare team about setting goals for when (sometimes if) and how you can start weaning your baby off the tube feedings. It’s not a one-size-fits-all situation, but together you’ll find the right rhythm.
Tip: Ask if you can begin offering the breast before tube feedings. With time, you may be able to slowly shift the balance—more nursing, fewer tube feeds. Every small gain is something to be proud of. Let your team support that progress at a pace that’s safe for your baby. And if you’re finding resistance, seeking another provider may sometimes be the answer.
Don’t Get Discouraged—Your Journey Is Yours
It’s tempting to compare your path to someone else’s—especially when their baby latches like a dream and yours is still struggling. But their story isn’t yours. And that’s a good thing.
Your baby, your body, your timeline. That’s what matters here.
Tip: When it gets tough (because it will), take a pause. Let yourself feel the feelings, then reach for your support system—whether that’s a friend, a doula, a lactation consultant, or someone who’s walked this road before. You are not behind. You are becoming.
A Quick Recap of My Best Tips for Breastfeeding After the NICU:
Start slow and be patient with yourself and your baby.
Trust your baby’s cues—they know what they need.
Get experienced lactation support—especially someone with NICU insight.
Prioritize skin-to-skin—it’s healing for both of you.
Make a plan to gradually wean off feeding tubes (if that’s part of your journey).
Don’t let comparison steal your joy—this is your path, and you’re doing amazing.
Ready to Get More Tips on Empowering Your Birth Journey?
If this spoke to you, just wait until you see what I share in my emails. Real talk, compassionate tips, and guidance designed to help you own your birth and postpartum experience. Join the email list (link in bio) and let’s keep walking this path together—with honesty, strategy, and zero shame.
Your Turn: What has been the hardest part of your breastfeeding journey so far? Drop a comment and share—I’d love to hear from you!
