18. 5 Tips for Staying Involved in Your Baby’s NICU Care with Family-Integrated Care
No one dreams of their baby making a grand entrance into the world only to land in the NICU. But here you are, navigating a place where beeping monitors and medical rounds feel like a second language. And while the NICU can feel like a VIP section where you need a backstage pass to even hold your baby, let’s get one thing straight: You belong here.
Family-integrated care (FIC) isn’t just some feel-good hospital buzzword—it’s about making sure you, as a parent, are actively involved in your baby’s care, decisions, and daily routines. You’re not a guest. You’re the main character. And even in a medical setting, your instincts and presence are just as important as any machine in the room.
So, how do you stay involved when it feels like the NICU is running the show? Here are five ways to make sure you’re not just a bystander in your baby’s care—but an essential part of the team.
1. Learn the NICU Lingo (Without Feeling Like You Need a Medical Degree)
The NICU has a way of making you feel like you accidentally enrolled in med school. CPAP, TPN, bilirubin levels—suddenly, your baby’s care plan sounds like an alien language. But here’s the deal: You don’t need to be a doctor to understand what’s going on.
Ask your baby’s care team to explain things in plain English. No shame in saying, “Wait—can you break that down for me?”
Keep a NICU notebook to jot down key terms, daily updates, and questions for rounds.
Advocate for yourself. If you don’t understand why something is happening, ask. No one expects you to just nod along and pretend you get it.
Understanding the basics helps you feel less like an outsider and more like an informed, confident parent who’s part of the decision-making process.
2. Get Hands-On (Yes, Even with the Wires and Tubes Everywhere)
It’s easy to feel like you’re watching your baby be cared for instead of actually doing the caring. But FIC means you are just as much a caregiver as the NICU team.
Depending on your baby’s medical needs, here’s how you can get involved:
✔ Diaper changes (Yes, even with all the wires. Your nurse will guide you!)
✔ Temperature checks (You’ll feel like a pro in no time.)
✔ Skin-to-skin (kangaroo care) if your baby is stable enough—this one is HUGE for bonding and regulating baby’s heart rate and breathing.
✔ Feeding involvement—whether it’s helping with tube feeds, learning about breastfeeding in the NICU, or prepping bottles.
These small but powerful actions make a massive difference—not just for your confidence, but for your baby’s development, too.
3. Show Up for Rounds Like It’s a VIP Meeting (Because It Is)
NICU rounds are where the big decisions get made. The medical team discusses your baby’s progress, any changes in care, and next steps. And guess what? You’re allowed to be there. In fact, you should be there.
Ask your NICU team what time rounds happen so you can be present.
Keep a running list of questions and concerns—no detail is too small.
If something doesn’t sit right with you, speak up. Your gut instinct as a parent is valid.
This is your chance to have a say in your baby’s care plan, so don’t let hospital hierarchies intimidate you.
You’re not just a visitor—you’re a vital part of the team.
4. Advocate Like a Boss (Because No One Knows Your Baby Like You Do)
You might feel like the least qualified person in the room, but let’s get one thing straight: you are the expert on your baby. Period.
If you have concerns about your baby’s care, say something. You don’t have to be aggressive—just assertive.
If something feels off, ask for clarification. A second explanation, a second opinion—whatever you need to feel informed.
Remember, you have rights in the NICU. You’re allowed to ask for accommodations, request specific feeding plans, and participate in care decisions.
The NICU can be overwhelming, but you are your baby’s best advocate. Trust that.
The NICU can be overwhelming, but you are your baby’s best advocate. Trust that.
5. Take Care of Yourself (Because You Can’t Pour from an Empty Cup)
I know, I know—self-care in the NICU sounds like a joke when you’re running on caffeine and stress. But listen: You cannot show up for your baby if you’re running on fumes.
Take breaks. Even superheroes need rest.
Eat real food (not just vending machine snacks).
Lean on your support system. Whether it’s your partner, a friend, or a NICU support group—don’t do this alone.
Give yourself grace. You will have hard days. You will cry in the car. That doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means you’re human.
The NICU marathon is not just about surviving—it’s about pacing yourself so you can thrive.
The Bottom Line: You Are Not a Guest in the NICU—You Are Your Baby’s Parent
Your baby may be in the NICU, but that doesn’t mean you take a backseat. Family-integrated care is about making sure you are at the center of your baby’s journey—just as much as any doctor, nurse, or specialist.
You belong here. Your presence matters. And even on the days when it feels like the NICU is running the show, never forget: YOU are the most important person in your baby’s world.
Want more guidance on navigating the NICU with confidence? Join my email list for empowering insights, expert tips, and support to help you feel informed, prepared, and in control of your baby’s care. Because no parent should have to go through this journey feeling powerless. 💛
